#Want to be a Success?
#Then Change Your Thinking Habits!
When I was still in Film School at UCLA, I worked for the excellent Lew Hunter (Screenwriting 434: The Industry's Premier Teacher Reveals the Secrets of a Successful Screenplay (2004), the legendary head of UCLA’s Screenwriting Program. Among my many duties, it was my job to find speakers to encourage the mostly young filmmakers to continue on, despite how hard the journey might become.
Or as another excellent professor at UCLA, Howard Suber (The Power of Film (2006), would often say: “It’s not the most talented who succeed. It’s the ones who can withstand the despair!” So because I was older and knew about despair first hand, (my baby sister had just committed suicide), I contacted an excellent psychologist I knew from my days at UCLA’s NPI, Robert Mauer. And Bob was kind enough to come and lecture our screenwriters and filmmakers on success.
He’d gotten tired of just hearing everyone’s problems, so Bob went out and interviewed highly successful people. Here’s what he found that successful people had in common.
These are the four skills of successful people:
1. An awareness of the need for attention and appreciation as well as generosity in giving and receiving it.
An awareness of and respect for FEAR! A willingness to feel it, and reach for comfort, i.e., emotional nurturance and technical assistance.
When afraid, successful people have a: “built-in nurturing voice” that automatically and compassionately reassures them that, “It is okay to make mistakes, okay to be afraid, and okay to ask for help.”
A sense of mission or vision: successful people are clear about their goals, and their sense of purpose sustains them in crisis.
If you’ve had a second session with me, then you’ll recognize a lot of that, because it’s part of the Inner-Child MP3. “It’s okay to be afraid, it’s okay to make mistakes, and it’s okay to ask for help!” I include that in my second session because so many people don’t have that positive “Inner voice.” If you, like me, were raised by damaged humans, then you might not have a compassionate inner voice. Instead, you might have a nasty inner-critic...read more on my website